Game of Thrones, Season 3, Episode 8 House/Order Power Rankings

With HBO airing a movie about Liberace next Sunday, we have to wait two weeks for another episode of Game of Thrones.  Fortunately, Episode 8 left us with a lot to chew on.  Anyway, here are your power rankings.

1. House Targaryen (Last Week – #1)

The house words of House Targaryen are “Fire and Blood,” usually meaning that this is how they “take what is theirs.”  Our Mother of Dragons, however, has found a third way to get what she wants, by batting her eyes and lounging around seductively.  They say sex sells, but in this case it buys.  It buys loyalty and a sack fulls of heads that is.

2. House Lannister (Last Week – #2)

Man, Tyrion just cannot get any respect.  Even after he pledges Sansa that he will never hurt her, she throws it back in his face with a “What if I never want to touch you?”  Ouch! Still, a good week for House Lannister in that Lord Tywin seems to have Joff the Bastard on a short leash for the time being.

3. The Night’s Watch (Last Week – NR)

Yeah Sam!  Kill that ice monster!

4. The Free People (Last Week – #3)

No sign of Jon Snow’s new friends this week.  Still, since this means that none of them were killed in nasty ways, they stay on the list.

5. House Baratheon (Last Week – #6)

Apparently Stannis is done grounding Davos, who is probably the only person able to keep Stannis grounded (see what I did there?).  They’ll have to wait and see if anything comes from the Red Witch’s ill-gotten-fire-leech curse.  I mean, c’mon, couldn’t she have just done that when he was sleeping instead of teasing him like that?

6. House Stark (Last Week – #5)

The direwolves keep dropping.  Sansa is married against her will, Arya has to put up with the Hound, and Robb has to put his war on hold to watch his bonehead uncle get married.

7. House Tyrell (Last Week – #4)

The Starks may be in trouble, but the Tyrell’s have fallen fully into the category known as “Tywin Lannister’s Pawns.”  And to think they were so close to the top.

8. House Greyjoy (Last Week – #8)

The Ironmen still control a decent sized chunk of land, and Stannis seems to think highly enough of them to put some kind of fire curse on their king.  Plus we didn’t have to watch Theon get tortured this week.

Also receiving votes: The Brotherhood Without Banners, House Tully, House Bolton, House Frey, the Second Sons, The Yunkai, leeches, The White Walkers, and the Red Keep’s (now empty, thanks to Tyrion) wine cellar.

(c) 2013 D.G. McCabe